When the tears paused and a lead grew Monday night, the Miami Marlins got to honouring Jose Fernandez by playing baseball the way he did: successfully, and with a smile.
The Marlins beat the New York Mets, 7-3, in a game that was so much more. A day after the sudden death of Fernandez, their ace and friend, in a boating accident off Miami Beach, the Marlins began wading together through the early stages of unimaginable loss, when nobody is sure what to do or when to do it but you wake up and do your day anyway.
At Marlins Park in Little Havana, that included baseball.
“Jose would not want us sitting around. That’s what everyone always says, right?” Marlins president David Samson said in the home dugout on Monday afternoon.
“But the fact is we have to play today. We’re going out and doing the best we can as an organisation, with heavy hearts and with an eye toward what matters, and that is honoring Jose – and that is not just today, win or lose, but moving forward.”
Fernandez, gone forever, was everywhere.
The Marlins, all wearing black No. 16 Fernandez jerseys, made three mound visits to say goodbye. The first came before the game, at the end of an emotionally intense pregame ceremony that pushed the first pitch to 7:16 p.m. It included a moment of silence and a slideshow of Fernandez photos set to a slow version of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame.” The eight Miami starting position players stood on either side of the mound.
After the national anthem, the Mets crossed the field to greet the Marlins, sharing hugs and handshakes and tears.
Then the Marlins gathered around the mound, kneeling to touch the dirt and rub it on their pant leg, the way Fernandez always did to help keep dry the right arm on which the organisation dreamt and built. When they huddled on the infield grass, Giancarlo Stanton spoke.
“If someone’s struggling, pick them up,” he said in a moment caught on television cameras. “We’re going to find a way to do this. I love you guys.”
Each player chose his own walkup music for the night. Some went with silence. Stanton picked Jay Z’s “Forever Young.”
If emotions started to settle once the game began, that relief was brief. Then Dee Gordon stepped to the plate in the bottom of the first inning. On the first pitch he saw from Mets right-hander Bartolo Colon, he stood in the right-handed batter’s box, a nod to Fernandez.
On the third pitch he saw, Gordon – switched to his normal side – took his first swing. His only home run of the season landed in the right-field upper deck.
Gordon tried to hold it in as he rounded the bases, but when he slowed to a walk, crossed home plate, tapped his chest and pointed to the sky, it all came out.
“It took forever. It seemed like it took forever,” Gordon said. “I was just trying to get back to my teammates as fast as possible. I couldn’t do that.”
Sobbing, he continued to the Marlins dugout, hugging Marcell Ozuna, then Martin Prado, then Barry Bonds, then Christian Yelich. He walked down four steps into a mob of teammates, all rubbing Gordon’s head or patting his back. Utility man Derek Dietrich and baserunning coach Lorenzo Bundy helped Gordon to the end of the dugout.
Gordon retreated down the tunnel for a moment to himself.
“I just kept looking over at the video board, kept seeing his name,” Gordon said.
“I just kept saying, ‘How is he not here? How did he not show up today?’ Every time I see his number and name I keep hearing his voice.”
The second mound visit came hours later. After the Marlins won, they circled around the bump, linked by arms over the shoulders of the teammate – the brother – standing next to them. They prayed. Ozuna patted the orange and black “16” painted into the dirt. Manager Don Mattingly kissed the ground.
“Just Jose. Saying bye,” Mattingly said.
“It’s his spot. It’s just his spot.”
The Marlins removed their hats and tossed them to the ground, a seemingly final salute of sorts to Fernandez.
To cheers from most of the 26,933 fans that remained for those initial postgame moments, the team walked off the field, through the dugout and into their clubhouse.
In the clubhouse, Fernandez’s locker remained largely untouched. A lone rose was tucked into the collar of the jersey he was supposed to wear Monday.
“There was strength. Strength came tonight,” Stanton said.
“We all dug as deep as we could and we gave it all that we had. It’ll take time.”
The third mound visit came when almost nobody was watching. Midnight neared as the Marlins, in a mostly empty Marlins Park, returned from the clubhouse to the mound, beers in hand and Fernandez still on their minds.
They stood together, some still wearing No. 16, for about 16 minutes, talking and sipping and even occasionally laughing. When they were done – not ready to move on, but maybe ready to go home – they raised their drinks, shouted Fernandez’s name one last time, and poured one out for their fallen friend. Foam seeped into the dirt. Somewhere, someone flipped a switch.
The stadium went dark.

RESULTS
Arizona     14     Washington     4
Chicago Cubs     12     Pittsburgh     2
NY Yankees     7     Toronto     5
Cleveland     7     Detroit     4
Miami     7     NY Mets     3
Milwaukee     8     Texas     3
Seattle     4     Houston     3 (11 inns)
White Sox     7     Tampa Bay     1
Cincinnati     15     St. Louis     2
LA Angels     2     Oakland     1